Okay, with that in mind maybe I can start with te word apple. It’s typically the first word used to represent the first word of the alphabet. You could have other words that start with the letter, "A" and be the keyword picture holder. Like aardvark. Or Antithesis. Actually, I don’t know how to picture antithesis. What else would be a noun that would start with a? Arthritis. That’s a condition.
Okay, that’s enough paddling about. Now, I want to go somewhere. Where would somebody go who is interested in spirituality or in things of a psychic nature?
Well, I can remember before I stepped over the line and became obviously psychic; the things that worried me in those days.
I used to think God didn’t care. I talked to him a lot, but it was sort of like shouting down into a well or hollering off the edge of a cliff. Nothing happened and although I might have vented my spleen I didn’t feel that much better for long. There was this unending ache in my heart about God in those days. It lasted for years from the time I was a little girl until the time when I finally stepped over the edge and opened to my psychic nature. I just had this emptiness inside, this yearning that I just couldn’t put a finger on to explain exactly what it was but that would not go away.
I had always thought in terms of God being masculine. Also, old. With a beard. God without a beard just didn’t cut it. I still refer to God in the masculine and still sort of think of Him so, but there’s a part of me that has come away from that way of thinking to think of God in a different way. Gone is the little girl anxiousness that if I don’t do right retribution will be swift or sure. So, I’m not so worried these days.
Now, instead of the yearning for something when I pray, the wanting for God to fix something for me about whatever is wrong, nowadays I try to sink into bliss. The thought I hold in my mind is that I just want to hang out in that place where peace is, where bliss is, where joy is, where love is. It doesn’t always happen to me, but it’s what I set out to do. I don’t get upset if I don’t quite get there. I know when it laps around at my edges. Usually, my eyes fill with tears and my heart seems to get bigger. Something inside gets bigger and it isn’t my stomach. I feel it up higher in my chest. I figure it must be my heart.
And, if that’s the only thing that will ever happen to me again as far as developing along the lines of spirituality and my psychic nature I’ll be happy. I’ve got a place to go to eventually. It’s the place I came from once upon a time. It’s a place I’ve gone to many times before. It’s the place I’ll go to when I’m done here.
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